At Ground Zero

Still no sign of Jan. She wasn't at her apartment, and I don't know where else to look. She doesn't answer calls or texts (Marsha let me borrow her cell).

I did, however, get news from the police: They found a body in the wreckage. The strange thing was that, based on what they've been able to recreate of the incident, he was right at the epicenter of the explosion, outside the Honor Code Office on the fourth floor of the Wilk, but he didn't die from the explosion. His skin wasn't burned at all. He died from the fall, once the explosion took out the floor beneath his feet, and the building collapsing on top of him. They've identified him as Stan Kirby, a student in the music department. Based on the evidence, they suspect he was the source of the explosion--not that he was carrying explosives, but that he was the explosive. A mutant.

The investigator who called me asked if I knew Stan, or had any idea why he would have used his mutant power to destroy a building at BYU. I lied. I told him the name didn't ring a bell. He said he figured it was a long shot, but he wanted to rule out the possibility that my friends or I were the target of what he called Stan's "terrorist attack."

I kept my mouth shut, but I do know Stan. He's no terrorist. I didn't say anything to the detective because I didn't want to explain that I know Stan from the Understanding Unnatural Power Proclivity club at BYU. I didn't know him well because he wasn't very talkative, but I know his dad is a pretty prominent businessman in Salt Lake, and he comes from a big Mormon family. I remember thinking at last week's UUPP meeting that Stan seemed really bothered by something. Someone even asked him what was wrong, but he just shook his head and said, "I don't want to talk about it."

Now that I know they think he was outside the Honor Code Office when it happened, I'm thinking that whatever his problem was last week, it had something to do with Honor Code issues. Maybe he wasn't doing a good job of keeping his powers in check. Maybe he was in trouble. Maybe he was being kicked out of BYU. Maybe he was scared of what his parents would say. Maybe he was angry at the Honor Code Office. Maybe him dying in the explosion he caused wasn't an accident.

So I guess I'm a jerk for not saying anything to the officer, just because I didn't want to out myself. Putting the truth out here on the blog eases my consciousness a little, but I know it's not the same. If the police investigator comes across this post and puts two and two together, then I deserve whatever consequence comes of that. Stan Kirby was not a terrorist. He was a mutant, and a Mormon, and a BYU student. Perhaps he made some mistakes--I really don't know--but he didn't deserve to die. He didn't deserve to feel like death was his only option. Nobody should ever feel that.